The Delicate Balance of Power
Over the past month I’ve been reflecting on the oh-so-delicate balance of power. Power in our relationships, in our work, and in our world. How much power do I have? Am I aware when I’m exercising it? Where are the imbalances around me? And the question that I’m reluctant to look in the mirror and ask: how am I complicit in allowing the scale to be tipped?
A passage from Anatomy of the Spirit by Dr. Caroline Myss, stirred up all this wondering:
In countless situations and relationships, the underlying dynamic at work is the negotiation of power: who has it, and how can we maintain our share of it.
It hit me sharply when one of my trusted life advisers prompted me to consider if I needed more power in my life and work. When I started to reflect on the question, then came across this statement, I realized that the last thing I need or want right now is any more power. (I feel obliged to say that, of course, the opposite is true for many women in the world).
I understood that not only do I not want any more power right now, but I want to soften the edges around my current power and make darn sure that I’m channeling it for good.
It’s not easy.
I then went on to think about a few of our clients who have power structures – not the org chart kind, but implicit, invisible power structures.
As fallible human beings, we’re constantly scanning our environment to take cues from those who appear that they have power. Maybe they’re white. Maybe they’re men. Maybe they’ve just been around longer than we have. But we watch them, sometimes from a distance, to observe and understand: What’s the tone? How do we behave around here? Are there standards to which I must hold myself?
These questions are important in our person day-to-day life, as we’re all just trying to do what we can each day. But also, as we pause to take in the remembrance of MLK and black history, I want to think this way about our world and how can I play my part, honestly assessing what kind of power I possess: in my family, in my work, and in my community.
Where does it lie, consciously and unconsciously? And what one little personal behavior do I have the power to tweak, which can help tip the scale to a more balanced place?
